Tales for Our Times-How Rebecca’s Plant Saved her Marriage
Inner Wisdom expresses itself most eloquently through images. Through the process of Interactive Imagery you dialog with your Inner Wisdom and discover whatever it is that you need to know. I am in awe of this process and of the beauty and power of the messages my clients receive. They often feel to me like modern mythology. In Tales for Our Times I offer these narratives to you. May you find the wisdom in these Tales both inspiring and beneficial.
How Rebecca’s Plant Saved her Marriage
Rebecca and Mark’s fights threatened to tear up their marriage. When Mark brought up something that bothered him, Rebecca became defensive. Mark would insist that she understand what he was trying to say which set her off on an angry tirade. In the ensuing fight, which could last for hours, they both said mean, hurtful things that were hard to forget. It sometimes took them days or even weeks to get over these fights.
Things improved through couple’s therapy. Mark learned to tell Rebecca his intention was not to be critical. They became better at working through the situation after argument. They fought less frequently. But when a fight came on, it still had the destructive power of a hurricane.
Even though both of them were thoroughly familiar with the pattern, they felt helpless to stop themselves from repeating it. In the face of Mark’s confrontation Rebecca couldn’t keep from becoming defensive and this set them off every time.
We decided to seek help from Rebecca’s Inner Wisdom to overcome the habit of defensiveness that began long ago in response to an abusive father.
I guide Rebecca to observe a seed growing into a Plant.* Once with her Plant, Rebecca feels deeply moved. She shares her sense of awe with the Plant.
The Plant replies, “You are not alone. Just as there are things that you recognize and appreciate about me, there are things that I recognize and appreciate about you.”
Rebecca finds comfort in being so deeply known and appreciated without having to say or do anything.
The Plant assures Rebecca, “It’s okay to say whatever you have to say to Mark. Even though he doesn’t understand, I always will.”
“That’s very comforting,” Rebecca replies, “but I’m still not sure what to do when Mark demands an explanation but I don’t know what to say.”
“It’s okay if what you say doesn’t make sense to Mark,” the Plant responds. “That may be his learning.”
Rebecca remains unconvinced. “That sounds really good,” she says, “but when Mark’s around it can be a real problem.”
“You can learn from watching me,” the Plant suggests. “I’m here. I have my roots firmly in the ground. Whatever happens, happens.”
Rebecca can see that though strong winds might blow or rain batter its leaves, the Plant remains calm and firm. Rebecca recognizes the value of remaining calm in the face of Mark’s negative comments, but she feels skeptical about her ability to actually do so.
The Plant invites Rebecca to merge with it so she can experience firsthand how to stay calm, rather than fall back into her old habit of defensiveness. (In Interactive Imagery you can energetically experience new ways of thinking or being by becoming one with your Guide.)
Merged with the Plant, Rebecca experiences a peacefulness she has never known before. She senses it as a sturdiness low in her belly that feels very stable and grounded. In this state she knows with all of her being that she does not need to react defensively when Mark gets on her case.
Once again separate, her Plant instructs Rebecca, “Since you cannot have your roots in the Earth, when you start feeling defensive, have your feet on the ground and bring your energy down.”
Rebecca agrees to do this.
Before leaving, the Plant reminds Rebecca, “I’m always here.”
Rebecca finds this deeply reassuring.
In the following weeks, any time that Mark brought up an annoyance Rebecca used the technique of grounding that she learned from her Plant. She experienced a solidness in her legs and belly that gave her a deep feeling of security.
Rebecca noticed that once she let go of her defensiveness, she was actually able to hear what Mark was saying and acknowledge his point of view before providing her own perspective. Feeling heard, Mark, in turn, became more willing to recognize Rebecca’s viewpoint. Their fights disappeared.
Are you trapped in negative relationship patterns you can’t seem to change?
When things aren’t working in a relationship, most of us try to change the other person. The truth is that you only have the power to change yourself.
Like Rebecca, you can seek guidance within.
- Your Divine Nature is the source of unconditional love for yourself and others. Connecting with this compassion can transform antagonism into understanding.
- Your Inner Wisdom may help you see the situation from a different perspective that can empower you handle it better.
- Your Intuition may show you how you could act differently to improve the situation.
Here’s how you do it:
- Take some time to calm yourself.
- Ask deep within, “What do I need to know that will help me deal better with this situation?”
- Wait patiently for any awareness that comes to you. Refrain from trying to come up with an answer. Rather just be open to any word or phrase or image that comes to you spontaneously.
When you approach a relationship from the perspective of your Divine nature, you are bound to handle it better. You’re also more likely to engage the Divine in the other person.
* As an introduction to Interactive Imagery, I often guide my clients to observe a seed grow into a Plant. The Plant grows from and expresses the Divine within. By interacting with the Plant, you develop a relationship with your own Divine Nature.
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